Some people can’t take a joke. And then there are people who have probably spent most of their time under a rock and have never even heard of the word “sarcasm.”
Unfortunately, this dude on Reddit went out on a date with a person who falls under the latter category.
A Reddit user by the name “Immortalsnail” posted a thread in the “Today I Fucked Up” subreddit titled, “TIFU by joking with a date I was a serial killer.”
It was Immortalsnail’s first date with a girl he’d recently met on Tinder. That’s a pretty delicate situation as it is, no doubt.
But, things were going smoothly. They sat down to eat at a restaurant, and his date even told him he was funnier in person than over text.
When their food arrived to the table, the potential couple began to talk about how refreshing it was to meet “normal” people on a dating app.
The girl specifically said she was happy he’s not a serial killer.
In an attempt to live up to what was now his funnier in-person reputation, Immortalsnail replied,
Oh thanks for thinking I’m normal! But I actually am a serial killer, bodies for days buried out at the farm.
OK, so, if it were me, I definitely would have laughed. Perhaps not genuinely, but still. It’s not the WORST joke I’ve ever heard.
Putting myself in this situation, I can’t help but wonder, are there people who would actually take that statement seriously? Really? Really?!
Apparently, this girl did.
She laughed, I laughed, I thought I did great at making it sound sarcastic.
She excuses herself to the bathroom to do whatever girls do in bathrooms on dates. It was taking a questionably long time for her to return and I was slightly worried she bailed and stuck me with the bill, my luck right. Wrong.
My luck was worse, as police officers suddenly appear out of nowhere and tell me to keep both of my hands visible on the table.
At this point I’m confused, this must be a joke. I see my date coming with a staff member and get ready for Ashton Kutcher to appear.
From there, the cops handcuffed him and took him “downtown,” as they say.
Then, he was forced to actually explain to the officers how he was only joking when he told his date, whom he’d never met before, that he was a serial killer.
I spent the next 5-6 hours explaining myself over and over and over that I was kidding.
I’m not sure how date number two will go but I’m excited to find out
Oh, honey, I don’t think there’s going to be a date number two.